This year I took on an incredible task--to forge my own magical blade. I was presented with a once in a lifetime opportunity and I was all too happy to seize it. One of my dearest friends teachers and Witches led a small group in the herbalism and metalworking skills we needed to craft an athame in the traditional way which he had learned as a young Witch. Little did I know that signing up to create my own magical blade was to have changed my very being in such a profound way before it was all over. I came right up against the limit of what I thought I could achieve... and I went beyond what my imagination could create. What began in late May with a hike in the woods and a few hard days with a hammer and files, has come complete with a quick sanding of the blade and refashioning of the handle on this winter's day.
To recount the story is a task for me to bite off a little at a time... for now, I will describe the physical attributes and work back from there. The blade is mostly made from iron and carbon. The iron began as half-inch rod. The carbon came from sacred willow charcoal which filled the forge. I had a troublesome knack for placing my metal in the hottest part of the forge. I also went about flattening the bar all wrong. I lost the tip of my blade and had to start all over again with a new iron rod. Once the blade was roughly shaped, additional meteoric iron was forged into the tip of the blade. This meteor brought with it minute amounts of silica. The blade was tempered with magical herbs in spring water. A copper hilt and a walnut handle was attached. The handle split when we were trying to attach the blade. This part of the creation was a sadness for me. I had deferred to my teacher for his expertise, turning over my piece to him. He broke my handle with brutish force. I knew better and I let him do it... believing that he saw (and knew) better than I. Was I too guilty and angry to heed the lesson in this? Perhaps nothing is more satisfying than when we get to break our own stuff? It left me not feeling right about things, but willing to go along and see what would become of my athame.
At Samhain, I consecrated the blade and covered in a special oil consisting of botanical resins, animal essences and herbs. I then hiked out into a Sierra Nevada watershed and found some friendly trees. I buried my blade at the east side of an oak tree until Midwinter (Yule). I returned on a beautiful Winter's day to retrieve my blade. It had seen freezing temperatures, light snow and much much rain. Water had scoured along the edge of the tree, but my blade handle was still tucked in the leaf debris. I found it corroded at the leading edges, but mostly as I had left it. I was very thankful, excited and distracted--I had to remind myself make a proper offering and pay due respect. All was well, but the handle had failed; it was not looking good nor holding the blade any longer. I returned home and sat with this task for a bit.
Do I put more work to save a compromised handle? Am I still angry and disappointed with myself for not having enough confidence to cease control of my work at the right time? I decided that I had to toss the handle and try again. It was odd to struggle as I did with the decision--feeling attached to what I had started and intended for this piece. So far, that has been the lesson of this work. I have a place in the outcome--the final piece--but I do not get to decide how it will be or get attached to any one idea until it is complete. I am a partner to something greater than me (or any other human) in making this tool.
Once I resolved to remake the handle, the energy shifted and I realized that this piece was finally very close to completion. I went out into the garage, found a small saw and proceeded to cut up my old walnut besom--which had failed in March after a boisterous parade and rally with the Besom Brigade. I found a good part of the handle that would accept the blade well and I went to work with my saw and some files. It came together in a few hours... so easy and fast that I didn't have time to even question it all. The handle took up the blade just as I wanted it to and I kept the quartz tip-which was original from the besom.
Blessed Be
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